I am in a season where I need to let go. I am not talking about letting go of people or relationships. I am talking about letting go of my own expectations. In particular I am referring to fixing up the condo in Grand Rapids and moving in July, 2024. I have a picture in my head of moving into a finished, beautifully furnished and organized condo. Every nail hole will be filled and new lighting installed everywhere. The perfect pictures will be hung in gorgeous arrangements in just the right setting. The new stainless cookware (which I do not own yet) will be in living in our organized kitchen with pull out shelving (which I don't have yet). The antique piece of furniture (which I don't have yet) that will serve as my coffee bar will be stocked with the most beautiful and functional coffee machines (which I also don't own yet).
I am so thankful that I have been able to make a huge amount of progress by hiring painters, flooring people and my favorite carpenter to put in master bath vanity and toilet. With some help from some wonderful people in my life I let go of thinking that I could do everything myself. I am so fortunate that I was able to afford to have things done. Once kitchen appliances are delivered the condo is livable. Is the condo how I want it? No. Is it finished? (when is a house truly "finished"?) My partner helped me reframe this desire to finish everything before we move in. He helped me by pointing out that I will need things to do when we live there. I can pick a project for myself and how nice to be able to work on it while living there instead of going back and forth from Detroit. I can work on a project when I feel up to it with no hard and fast deadline. My guess is that by living there I will change some of my ideas when I see how we use the space.
There is one last thing that I have been trying to remember. I want to choose people over things. I want to spend precious time with my people when I get the chance. This may mean my decor takes a little longer to put in place and that is ok. If cancer has taught me anything it is to appreciate time with your loved ones while you have it!
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